Wednesday, April 14, 2010


I have two sisters and one brother, we are balanced in our family, in every way you look at it... we came in the order of boy, girl, boy then girl again. My favourite of my siblings is the littlest of us all, so when they closed school for the holidays I was very excited (my dad decided to take her to a boarding school this year, something I silently disapprove- she's turning eleven in two days!) and looked forward to seeing her. Three months seemed like ages. When mom goes to visit her during visiting days, they must call and I would talk to her and the first thing she'd ask is why I hadn't gone... laziness :(. Well, I love that kid. And now I realize I should have made the title of this post Emily Matters, for I see this being purely about her.

Anyway, I kept wondering how big she'd grown, would she be taller than me now? (Oh, she's tall for a ten year old I think). Did them boobs pop up yet? She walked through the door with my other sister who had gone to pick her up and I wasn't far off, she's grown. But she's still flat around the upper abdomen part :). People do have a problem with the way I usually talk about my female family members, I hope you don't. I remember when a female cousin came over to visit us for a few days one time. I started talking about how cute she was with my friends and  I was told I was not supposed to say that due to the fact that we are family. I don't know, it's not like I want to have sex with her!! I'm just pointing out an obvious fact.

Speaking of sex. But wait. I need to sadly tell you that Emily didn't do well in her end term exams. No, she did pretty bad! I guess boarding school doesn't mean better grades. And my dad, yes he's concerned but I'm surprised he's not making the noise he used to during my time. I used to do fairly well but it was never enough! What, did he lose his voice?! Okay. Okay. Having said all that I can now bring in the sex part. I have been volunteering to offer Emily home tutoring when I get the time. She came home with sample test papers from her school which we would go through together after a little lesson. Now these science papers are filled with so many reproduction questions with a penis diagram here and a vagina there, talk of sperms here and ova there (ova there?), what's a brother to do? I did what I had to do, I provided a little sex education and funny enough she felt most uncomfortable. For some reason my favourite part was the part where I explained to her what menstruation was. I must admit I was a bit (a bit) uncomfortable too so I kept it strictly formal. Sometimes I just feel I'm the wrong person to be teaching her these stuff, where are the parents at?! But she knows these things. Going through the female reproductive parts, I asked her what the uterus is. She said its where the baby grows... I was proud :)

And my thirteen year old brother, the quiet type, still sucks his thumb, you can find him doing it 90% of the time. I let him play Fifa on my laptop the other day (I know, these 'other days' have become one too many) and he missed to score by an inch and he went "fuck!". What can I say, he just might have picked it from me. As much as parenting is tough, parents you need to be involved in almost every part of your kid's life! The woes of being a first born... you become a parent before your time.

10 Educated Opinions Yet:

Savvy said...

Wow..I love the way you write. Am a 1st born, bt there's little space btn me and my two bros so no parenting. Though the responsibility is there.

Anonymous said...

Im an only child...can't relate!

Nice tho :)

carolkmail said...

Haha! Unfortunately for you, that is what first born is all about! Sometimes I am glad I am surrounded by boys, including my own. Really, I am swimming in boyzone, so I can imagine your agony! I think you are doing a good job, never mind where the parents are. Keep at it, I might just employ you as a tutor for the uncomfortable lessons, sooner than later.

Mama said...

Wyndago, you are my new favourite writer! I have to tell you though talking about your family's boobs is a lot weird!

You are a real nice bro me-a chick-can't even tell my baby sis who's 15 btw anything abt reproductive parts-let alone menstruation. In our family such things have just never been spoken about, not even in an academic context. No wonder I need a shrink to straighten me out on sex matters.

Squashys Girl said...

I'm a first born too. My sister is 8 years younger than me. And it is a bit like I helped raise her. Its awesome the love you have for your sister. I love mine so much, even though being the oldest is hard.

Wyndago said...

@Savvy, thanks. Then you may not really enjoying full benefits that come with being the eldest, are you? Like bossing the little ones around :)

@Joliea, how does that feel, to be an only child? It must suck!

@carolkmail hehe, yours was a comment I eagerly anticipated. That lil boy is going to need someone to explain to him why his 'pee' looks 'abnormal' when he starts having wet dreams! :). You're lucky though, boys are easy but you can still call me.

@mama Thanks! And I will quit talking about my family's boobs. But I'll do a little survey to see if the majority think its weird. hehe. And you don't need a shrink, I hope you don't pay any of them!

@Squashys Girl, wow. Its like we are the forgotten heroes! Everyone is talking about mothers and grandmothers, Firstborns should be right there next to them. Are you by any chance a Gemini?

lulu said...

family matter for real wyndago, hahaha my dad talked to me about periods and bought me my first pads so its cool and yeah its okay to say your relatives are hot!

rockhead said...

Hahaha Wyndago am not sure u r the right guy to be tutoring her, tee hee hee. It's nice how you love your family though :). And yeah, it's a little weird for family to comment on how cute their other family members are...but I think u r being real coz most other people notice too it's just that they don't say it.

Wyndago said...

@lulu, Thank you! It's okay to say my relatives are hot! SO am I by the way.

@Rockhead, true dat, just being real. And I don't think I am the right guy to tutor either. Hehe.

Chiira said...

Great work that you are doing with your sister. Am lucky that at home we are all close to our mum otherwise i would have a hard time trying to explain some things to my sisters apart from study work.

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